Women Supporting Women: Have We Really Made It That Far?Feb 15, 2023
In my late 20s, I worked for a government entity that, as I look back, had some pretty powerful women who honestly scared the crap out of me. Some abused their power and position and seemed to revel in the havoc they created in the workplace. I sometimes wondered what their paths were; what did I miss that took me in a totally different direction, and where did I mess up? It appeared I failed the assignment. I could never imagine yielding so much power and authority over others. To be acknowledged by them was such an honor, and when not favored, it was brutal. Many of us scrambled like starving children, seeking any tiny bit of acceptance to ensure our survival which only seemed to feed the fire more. This influence did not create a cohesive work environment, but there was a lot of talent there, so we got the job done and exceeded expectations—failure was not an option. There were many casualties along the way, from team members leaving to seek other opportunities to others trying desperately to keep their marriages and families from falling apart at home.
Around that time, I was struck by something I read from Marianne Williamson, who explained that women do not have to act like men to be powerful. I wished the women I worked with knew that one! This started me thinking, so, of course, I went to the woman with all the answers, my mom. She shared with me that men and women are raised differently. Basically, men were raised to work as a team and women to be competitive with each other. This made sense to me when I thought of the good old boy network and white men in so many leadership positions. Boys grew up playing team sports and supporting each other, learning at a very young age to be team players and to watch each other’s back. Women, on the other hand, had to be the smartest and the prettiest if we were going to be able to attract a husband (I feel so old saying that). Things are shifting, but we still have a way to go.
Today I recognize that early imprint experiences follow women even into their later years. It’s clear to me now that women can get so stuck in their own insecurities and perceived failures they still lash out at other women instead of supporting them. As an entrepreneur, it is easy to slip into the old or expected roles in business, but we have an amazing opportunity to create a new narrative. We get to choose how we do business, who we work with, and who we support. For many years, I made a conscious effort to choose women for professional services, and now in my own business, I love finding women to work with who are talented and passionate. Sometimes they need someone to lift and guide them onto their path. One woman referred to me as her Fairy Godmother, and others have recognized the momma bear energy I bring to the table. When I see women who are hesitant to speak up for what they want, I want to lift, guide, and provide support—we’ve got to stop sitting on the sidelines.
For so many years, I have been blessed to have women around me who saw something in me that, at the time, I didn’t see in myself. And now, I have finally reached that sweet spot in life where I realize the value in myself and those women who have lifted me along the way. Why did it take so darn long to get here? I do have the most amazing women around me, and for a while, I couldn’t figure out how they ended up in my life or how I was attracting them. The more I accept myself and love myself, the more I attract those people into my life. The Law of Attraction is always at work. As time goes by, I am still learning and growing because, after all, this so-called life is a journey, not a destination, and this Manifesting Maven is going to squeeze every juicy drop of this life she can.
Kimberly Cline is a Co-Creator, Image Guru, and Cheerleader who believes the universe is conspiring to help you prosper! Learn more at KimberlyCline.com